Go Back to the Beginning

 In looking at my old writing books, I decided that the best way to deal with my lack of motivation to write regularly was to reach back into my past and try to tap into some of the enthusiasm and excitement I used to have about it. That book, What If?, that I talked about in my previous post was a book that I bought when the idea of being a writer was fresh and new and untainted by the harsh reality that writing is hard and getting published is harder. I was falling in love with words and relishing my own self-assigned brilliance when I was able to string those words together in a way that pleased me. 

The first exercise in the book involves writing a series of first sentences. These are just that, first sentences, with no expectation that you will take it any farther. It's about gaining experience in starting a story in media res, or in the middle. The most compelling stories are the ones that (ironically, for this post) do not begin at the beginning. When I was a teenager and had just purchased this book, I did this exercise a lot. It was fun and I enjoyed coming up with sentences that were surprising or funny in some way. 

To try to kick-start (again) a regular writing habit, I thought it would be a good idea to try to go back in my mind to that time, so I started by returning to that exercise. And it was fun! I enjoyed it. But I have to admit, I also had a hard time with it. There's something different about a middle-aged, jaded brain tackling this exercise as opposed to an optimistic young brain (that is, perhaps, obvious). I reveled in it then; I found it more difficult to get into the state of mind needed now. 

What is that state of mind? Open, careless, playful. That's where I need to be to write regularly because that's the state of mind that gives the practice a sense of joy. I need that state of mind for all of my creative endeavors, really. It's a matter of letting go of all the thoughts that bog my mind down (what will people think? is this too weird? nobody's going to get this) so that I can approach it weightlessly. Easier said than done.

Here is a photo I took yesterday that I will add to my Ordinary Beauty Photo Challenge. It's taken at the Hoover Dam. I don't consider going to the Hoover Dam to be ordinary, despite our relative proximity to it. But I wanted to look at some small un-noticed area and capture its beauty. Some small part of the whole that isn't the most obvious photo opportunity. I like the curved line of the shadow, the blues and greens, the tiny wavelets. 

Writers write.

 

This is a photo of all of the books about writing that I have collected over the years. Some of them I have read more than once. Some more than twice. Some I have never finished and at least one I never started. That one called What If? near the top of the stack was a book my high school English teacher used when she was teaching a unit on creative writing. She had a well-thumbed copy on her desk and I asked her about it, found it at the bookstore, and bought one for myself. One of the few teachers I had who left a lasting, positive impression on me. Just today I discovered that there is a longer, more involved version of that book that is used in college writing classes and I am tempted to get that to add to my pile. 

Where am I going with this blog post? I don't know. I've just been thinking about writing. I've been thinking about all the years in which I have wanted to be a writer and all the years in which I haven't written consistently. There have been huge gaps of time in which I didn't bother writing any kind of fiction at all. 

I started and finished 4 (maybe 5?) stories when I was taking a couple of fiction classes in my 40s that earned me a creative writing associate's degree. Over the past couple of years, I got a good start on a couple of different stories, but just that--starts. No finishes. Most of the time I don't even have starts. Most of the time I don't even have random exercises. 

I really want to change that. I really want to figure out how.

The Other Finished Objects

 My catch-up schedule (as referenced in the previous post) says I need to finish 3 creations each week in July. My previous post showed you one; here are the other two.

These two hoops are re-makes of a couple of hoops I made previously and sold. My customer (who shares my name and has an awesome collection of whimsical, colorful art on her walls) asked if I would revisit these designs. It's actually the first time I've re-made a cloudburst hoop like that. I usually just grab some fabric that catches my fancy and add elements as I go, without any definitive plan. I do think I prefer doing it that way more, but I also enjoyed the idea of re-creating something specifically because someone liked the original. And these two are designs that I really did love how they turned out the first time around. All in all, a good experience.

So, I'm going to make two posts, one after the other...

 I got to the end of June without catching up on my challenges, but that was fine because I did get closer. And, honestly, I was being a little unreasonable with the timeline anyway. Whatever. New plan! I'm going to catch up on all categories by the end of July! I made myself a little schedule that told me how many whatevers I needed to do/make/watch/listen to in each week and then promptly set about not doing them. Today is Thursday which is the last day of the week (you might think the last day of the week is actually Friday, Saturday, or Sunday, depending on your particular philosophy of day-counting, but you would be wrong--at least for the second half of 2026...hello, welcome to my brain), which means I can catch up to my schedule by catching up to this end-of-week checkpoint. Which means I need to make two blog posts today. I'm sure this all makes perfect sense to everyone in the world, including, and especially, to me.

I also needed to finish creating some object or other by the end of the day, so I wrapped it up with this beauty.

And by "beauty" I mean "nope" because, through no fault at all of the pattern, I did not do a very good job with this piece. As it's a holiday piece, you can probably tell there was some amount of avoidance going on with it, but what would you say if I told you I started this piece in 2022? Probably nothing, as it's not really that interesting of a fact. It was a free pattern meant to be done as an advent piece. You stitch one element every day of December until X-mas has arrived. Obviously, I didn't do that. I did a few elements, set it aside, picked it up years later, did a few more, set it aside... and so on. 

But it's finished now! Too bad my stitching is so inconsistent and weird. Too bad my color choices have created absolutely no cohesiveness whatsoever. It's done and it's going on the list. 

Finished Object and How Goes the Catching Up

 I posted this one the other day thinking I was finished, or possibly that it just needed a couple small things added and to shift the hoop frame because the top was off center. So I shifted and added and it turned out I actually needed to add quite a bit more. But it's done now and I'm calling it Orange Crush.

I'm currently stitching two additional cloudburst hoops that were a custom order of two designs I had previously made and then sold. This custom order made me think I could probably make a custom listing for this size of cloudburst hoop, made-to-order style, in which one can order from a variety of designs I have previously made. So I'm working on getting that together, but first I need to make sure I have the materials. Then I need to decide which designs to offer. I do not normally offer commissions or customs, because it stresses me out. But remaking something tried and true is different and something I think I can enjoy.

As for my catching up with my challenges, I am at the point where I need to catch up with my catching up. Oh, well. No matter what happens at least I have made progress. And I do think I will get to where I want to be by the end of the year.

Broken Records

 With an order that I took today, a custom request for two cloudburst pieces that are essentially re-making two cloudbursts I made in the past that sold, I have officially surpassed my highest year's revenue since I opened my Etsy shop. I won't mention what that amount is because my business is still really at the hobby level, but I just wanted to make note of it because having gotten to that point when the year's still not quite to the halfway mark feels really good. 

In other news, yesterday Pat, one of our kids, and I went out to the Desert National Wildlife Refuge for some nature therapy. It was over 100 degrees, but there was shade (in places) and a breeze so the heat didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. There was a lot to see and hear (Merlin told me there was a Blue Grosbeak! (birds became interesting to us when we turned 50, that's just how it goes)) and I took the time to really notice the calm, peace, and happiness in my body that was purely the result of being in nature. Sometimes I think I forget how profound that feeling is and it surprises me when it washes over me again.

 

Packaging Personal Touches

 I've sent out a handful of orders in boxes that I upcycled by adding posca pen decorations to appropriate sized boxes I had received myself in the mail. I loved doing that and felt like I was adding a fun element for the person who had ordered my art. Not only did it give me a chance to reuse something that was essentially garbage, but it added something personal to the experience of buying some of my art.

Unfortunately I don't get appropriate-sized boxes that often. My usual go-to for sending out a piece of embroidery hoop art is a bubble envelope. But I want to keep my whimsy level sustained for all of my packages, not just some. So, I decided to pre-decorate a couple of them yesterday and today. The rainbow is cute, but basic. The butterfly, though--! I'm enamored with how that turned out. 

I'm going to work on creating a small stock of decorated packaging, so I have it ready for any and all sales.